Ross prepares for Scientology’s hardcore detox program, in which he’ll sweat out his toxins in a sauna and chug niacin until he’s free of the harmful effects of… peas? Plus, when they’re found out, will Ross and Carrie be kicked out of Scientology?

Ross and Carrie review “The Way to Happiness,” a 70-page booklet that is IN NO WAY affiliated with Scientology, other than being written by its founder, L. Ron Hubbard. Hear about their visit to the group that distributes this life-changing tome.

We can’t think of a better way to spend a Sunday morning than to enjoy brunch at the Scientology Celebrity Center. Just try to avoid the breaking-into-the-industry course down the hall. Learn how Tom Hanks made it, and learn how to maximize your confront!

Ross and Carrie visit the L. Ron Hubbard Life Exhibition. Let your eyes widen as you hear the various questionable biographical details of the founder’s life, from being the youngest-ever Eagle Scout to performing microbiological studies… by himself.

The “fun” continues as Ross and Carrie get certified in Dianetics. The pair spend 22 hours at the Church over one weekend, learning how experiences are encoded in our cells, what an “engram” is, and how to audit your friends for neither fun, nor profit.

Ross tells the story of being the only student in Scientology’s “advanced” personal efficiency course.

Ross continues taking his Personal Efficiency course, and Carrie visits the semi-exclusive Scientology New Year’s party. Who’s accidentally sent into a Sea Org meeting? Who gets a free Church membership? What’s an “upset”? And who the heck is Ross Blocker?

Ross and Carrie walk over to “Big Blue”, Scientology’s L.A. Ideal Org. They come for the free personality test, but stay for two additional tests and a sales pitch. Do they sign up for classes? Is this the investigation we’ve all been waiting for?

Ross and Carrie take the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator to find out what makes them tick. Is personality testing an unscientific fad, or are there really 16 kinds of people? Is Carrie secretly introverted? Does Ross have commitment problems? Let’s see!

Ross and Carrie unwrap a brand new Hasbro edition of the Ouija Board and invite their loved ones to consult with the local spirits. Do they make contact? Does the planchette even move? Does Drew have dandruff? Will Cara finally have that baby?